There’s an echo, echo, echo,
in my room, my room today.
It’s an echo that I wish,
I wish, I wish would go away.
It’s a problem, it’s a problem,
for no matter what I do,
if I make a sound, a sound,
the echo, echo makes it too.
When this echo, echo, echo,
started, started yesterday,
I was not amused, was not amused.
It’s not okay, okay.
Now I must be silent, silent.
I’m afraid, afraid to speak.
If I’m talking, if I’m talking,
it might last, might last all week.
It’s annoying, but it seems, it seems,
it’s here, it’s here to stay.
It’s my parrot, it’s my parrot
saying everything I say.
I bought a black banana,
And a broken baseball bat.
A burst balloon, a busted boat,
A beat-up bowler hat.
I wasn’t being brainy, bright,
or brilliant, but you see,
My brain was boggled after
Being bitten by a bee.
My sheep is being sheepish.
My cat is acting catty.
My horse, of course, is sort of hoarse.
My bat’s completely batty.
My chicken’s plainly chicken.
My hare is fairly hairy.
My cuckoo’s truly cuckoo.
My mare is mainly merry.
My fish is frankly fishy,
and so my flea is fleeing.
My slug is somewhat sluggish.
My bee is simply being.
I have so many animals
and this is how they’re feeling,
except for one, who’s tons of fun:
My seal is on the ceiling.
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Hello, my name is Madison.
I live on Lincoln Street.
I’m in the state of Washington.
I think that’s pretty neat.
My middle name is Kennedy.
My last name is Monroe.
My name has got more Presidents
than anyone I know.
My father’s name is Harrison.
My brother’s name is Grant.
My mother’s name is Reagan,
and Taylor is my aunt.
I go to Eisenhower School.
My family drives a Ford.
That’s way too many Presidents
to ever be ignored.
It can’t just be coincidence.
It’s not some chance event.
When I grow up, it’s obvious…
I’ll be the President!
I met a lonely octopus
while sitting on a docktopus
and he began to talktopus
and this is what he said:
“Hello, my name is Jacquestopus.
I’d like to take a walktopus
perhaps around the blocktopus
or to the park instead.”
I didn’t mean to gawktopus,
but I was in such shocktopus
to meet a talking octopus,
I must have lost my head.
It seems I socked poor Jacquestopus
and knocked him off the docktopus,
and so that talking octopus
got fairly scared, and fled.
I hope someday that Jacquestopus
forgives me for the socktopus
and comes back to the docktopus
where he can meet my croctopus
who says his name is Fred.
When chemists die, they barium.
Dead kings get throne away.
Magicians simply disappear.
Dog catchers go astray.
When chauffeurs pass, they lose their drive.
Dead ranchers get deranged.
Composers simply decompose,
while bankers are unchanged.
It’s said that swimmers have a stroke.
Mechanics are retired.
The end for human cannonballs
is often when they’re fired.
Librarians, they just check out.
Shoemakers get the boot.
Old cows just kick the bucket, and
dead owls don’t give a hoot.
When travel agents go
they take a permanent vacation,
and dead cartoonists end up
in suspended animation.
My setter has a sweater
from The Setter Sweater Store.
It’s better than the sweater
that my setter had before.
Her sweater has a letter
in the center of the chest.
(The lettered setter sweaters
are what setters like the best.)
And if you ever met her
you could get to pet her sweater.
(You should pet a lettered sweater;
there’s no setter sweater better!)
So if your pet’s a setter
then I bet you’ll pet her more
if you get her lettered sweaters
from The Setter Sweater Store.
My brother’s always such a ham.
That’s my biggest beef.
His puns are all so cheesy
and he will not lettuce leaf.
His gags are somewhat onionique.
They make us want to cry.
They’re often sort of corny,
and they’re never all that rye.
And even if we’re chili,
in thyme he’ll find a reason
to pepper us with salty jokes
no matter what the season.
I mustard up the courage
to dessert one afternoon.
He lightly toasted me and said,
“I’ll ketchup with you soon.”
But now I’m in a pickle.
See, a nickel’s all I’ve got.
He says his jokes are ten cents each.
I mayo him a lot.
My hare is resting on my head.
I also have bear feet.
A swallow’s in my throat
and there are calves below my seat.
A seal is on my lips today.
A slug is on my fist.
A mussel’s on my shoulder
and a tick is on my wrist.
A wasp is on my yellow jacket
where it likes to bee.
A fly is on my zipper,
though I wish that it would flea.
My doe is in my wallet
and my sole is on my shoe.
I hope my tail was not a boar.
What’s gnu, my deer, with ewe?
An Echo in My Room
To B or Not to B
My Sheep Is Being Sheepish
1 H0P3 7H47 Y0U C4N R34D 7H15
Hello, My Name is Madison
I Met a Lonely Octopus
When Chemists Die, They Barium
The Setter Sweater Store
What a Ham
My Hare Is Resting on My Head
