In the middle of the jungle,
in the tallest of the trees,
there’s a monkey named Banana Dan
who’s quaking on his knees.

It’s a sad and sorry story
but it’s one that must be told,
as it used to be Banana Dan
was confident and bold.

He was once the monkey master
of a multitude of sports.
When he played the game of basketball
he used to rule the courts.

He could not be beat at racquetball
or bowling or lacrosse.
When it came to golf or volleyball
Banana Dan was boss.

And whenever he would win a game
bananas were the prize.
Yes, a hundred ripe bananas,
and you should have seen his eyes.

He would never take his winnings
and he wouldn’t even stay,
but instead Banana Dan would
always scream and run away.

Now he doesn’t drive or dribble,
and he doesn’t shoot and score,
and you’ll never see him playing
in the jungle anymore.

He just sits up in his treetop
where he’ll whimper and he’ll pout,
as he has bananaphobia;
bananas freak him out.