When Gilman Glum would suck his thumb,
he’d claim, “It’s just the best!
It’s simply incontestable.
I’ve put it to the test.

“I’ve sucked the thumbs of kings and queens,
of presidents and popes.
I’ve sucked the thumbs of geniuses
and even those of dopes.

“The taste is so delectable.
No other thumb compares.
I’ve tried the thumbs of beggared bums
and multimillionaires.

“I’ve tasted thumbs from far away
and thumbs from right next door;
from San Francisco, Santa Fe,
and even Singapore.

“I tried a few from Kathmandu
and Norway and Nepal.
Yes, when it comes to sucking thumbs
I’m sure I’ve tried them all.

“If ever you could try it too
I’m sure that you’d agree.
But, sadly though you’ll never know;
my thumb is just for me.”