I Have Noodles in My Nostrils

I have noodles in my nostrils.
I have noodles on my nose.
There are noodles on my cheeks and chin
and dripping down my clothes.

I've got more upon my forehead.
Some are sticking to my neck.
It's completely disconcerting.
I'm a noodle-covered wreck.

I can see them on my kneecaps,
and I know they're in my shoes.
(When I stand they're somewhat squishy
and I feel them start to ooze.)

There are several in my pockets.
There's a handful in my hair.
And I'm pretty sure that some are even
in my underwear.

So try not to do what I did.
I'm a total nincompoop,
and I fell asleep at lunch
while eating chicken noodle soup.

 --Kenn Nesbitt

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